I have been pondering the idea of forgiveness in my mind for a little while now. Probably have blogged about it a few times before. That’s likely because I’ve gone through many periods in my life, as many others have, where I’ve had to FORCE myself to forgive someone because I knew it would set me free. It didn’t matter when I found out about the wrong or even how………….what mattered were the choices I made right after that. It’s easy to dwell. It’s easy to sit and think about something for a long time and spin it different ways to make it fit what you believe to be true. Moving on from the wrong is the biggest service you can do for yourself and the person who wronged you.
Forgiveness is truly only the beginning of the journey that you go on through this process. It isn’t a magic pill that cures it all the instant you release someone from whatever you feel was done inappropriately towards you. The process………………..the beginning…………..the start of the next chapter. Your healing. You are allowing your healing to begin. This is where I start asking God to purge from my heart whatever ill or sad feelings I might be experiencing in that moment. Because they too can grow if not released and then what was the forgiveness for? I allow myself to feel whatever this purging process brings about because I’m growing through it. I’m being stretched. I’m seeing my own errors and learning to forgive myself for whatever role I may have played in the process. Any growing exercise brings out both sides of a story when you truly allow yourself to look at you. Sometimes we accept the unacceptable and we too must be accountable.
What I am learning now is to truly learn to allow God to provide my absolution. Even if you forgive someone for something, it doesn’t mean that they understand what they are being forgiven for. I say that to say this…………..if they aren’t willing to look into a mirror and soul search on their own, they won’t ever be able to admit their wrong. Therefore you won’t get an apology because they can’t see their level of responsibility. You have to be okay with that as you journey forward. Because apologies don’t always come. But God is more than faithful. He gives you what you need when you need it so all hope of forward movement should come through Him and only Him. I’ve had people, and have been a person myself, that apologized years later because that was when I knew I had taken full accountability for my role and I was capable of facing what that was. It’s a peace that is unexplainable on both ends. Forgiving and being forgiven. Life lesson………….Don’t stunt your growth by holding on to the past. Live, Love, and Let Go!
Until Next Time Lovies!