As I began to pack up the laptop and started to prepare for my long week ahead, my girlfriend tagged me in a post on FB and I had to stop what I was doing and begin to write.
The post was basically saying that a woman is stupid for leaving a man who cheats on her because it’s better to stay with him and let him cheat twenty times then to move on to someone else who is just going to cheat anyway. Implying that all men cheat no matter what the situation is. As I sat shaking my head in disbelief at what people truly think, I knew I had to have a response for it. There was no way around it.
Let me tell you something about cheating………..weak people do it. I said it…………WEAK PEOPLE. They come up with a million reasons that the cheating is justifiable because as soon as they decided they wanted to cheat, they made a long list of things that their mate wasn’t doing correctly. That list is to make sure they can validate their actions when someone finds out what they are doing. They have to have those talking points. (*side eye*) What they fail to realize is that this list…………it’s stupid stuff that is basic in relationships with any type of longevity associated with them. But they cling to this list because it’s their cause to fall in bed with the next person instead of watering their grass where they live. I’m not buying what they are selling.
People need to stop making excuses for their behavior and stand up to their actions. People cheat because they want to, opportunities are plentiful, and there are plenty of people out here who don’t mind being the person on the side. Whether it be a man or a woman, people need to start thinking about how they would feel if someone was laying up with their significant other behind their back when they desire and yearn for commitment. Instead, they don’t have to abide by the rules until they are ready for those rules to apply to the situation that they want to work out. Everyone out here is trying to apply logic to a situation that is illogical. There is no excuse to cheat on your mate.
No person in a relationship should expect to be cheated on. Why? What’s the purpose of commitment and marriage if that’s the way people are going to look at it? So we should feel there are no trustworthy people out here who will stick by their word and respect the person they are with? So does that mean we just do away with marriage and commitment all together and stop teaching the generations after us about how beautiful it is? (I’m going with a real strong no on that one) This goes for emotional and physical cheating because both happen too frequently. You can’t be texting and talking all the time and think you ain’t doing anything wrong. LIES! Be clear about that.
"Will I ever have a relationship where my mate is faith?"
You have to find the friend in your chosen partner. You’ve got to identify the reasons why you love that person because every single day y’all are together ain’t gonna be sunny! There are going to be days you hate their guts and don’t want to speak to them. But you’ve got to be clear why y’all are together and know that what you have is worth fighting for. If your every answer is to seek solace in someone else outside of your relationship when things aren’t peaches and cream then relationships are not for you my love. Just be honest with yourself.
We as women are setting the precedent on relationships because we have the final say in what will happen. If we start walking away from situations that are not of a benefit and away from people who are not loyal, they will start to get it because none of us are putting up with it. Now if you out here doing you just like they are you can’t complain about what you get. But under no circumstances should anyone believe that they are entering in to any relationship with someone who will never be responsible with their heart. It’s foolishness for anyone to believe that to be so.
So if you make the conscious decision to stay then you take what comes with it. If you know that’s what you have and you continue to accept it then this isn’t for you. I am not judgmental because I have been in situations where I have accepted less than what I deserved and made the conscious choice to do so. We all make stupid choices when we are in love or a real crazy lust we mistake for love until we know better…………………the key to it all is knowing what you and your loyalty are worth. When you prepare for something real you don’t need to feel you can’t have that. You have the right to it. PERIOD.
Until Next Time Lovies!