Being surround by people who care for you whether they are family or friends, is a priceless experience that we all often take for granted. Sometimes we forget that in that moment we are sharing with them, we may never experience it again. A concert, a road trip, a dinner, a glass of wine, a phone call. It doesn’t matter what it is, those are priceless moments that you share that you should cherish. It’s funny because for me, I experience things with my family and friends all the time that mean the world to me. We laugh and live in the moment and we look at one another and say, let’s plan for this again next year. We never realize that next year may never come.
After experiencing the death of my father, every moment means so much more to me than any moment mattered before. Because I constantly told myself that regardless of what I may have said or done the day or month or year before, I had time to make it up to him and to myself (for my behavior, words or feelings). After he passed, I was filled with a million regrets. Those regrets have made it very difficult for me to grieve his loss peacefully. His smile seems bigger, his laugh louder, his voice stronger. The memory of him lingers with me very strongly not just because I was apart of him and him apart of me but also because of my mistakes. I have found it difficult to forgive myself because I was unable to say the things or do the things I should have to release myself and him from things that were being held on to pointlessly. Life is so short. Only the cosmic blink of an eye. We are here and then we are gone. Our numbers will be called at some point and since we don’t know when that is, we should never place ourselves in situations where regrets are necessary.
So from this I have learned to say I love you, I need you, I respect you, I adore you, I’m angry with you but I forgive you, I’ll help you in any way I can, you mean the world to me. No matter what it may be never leave those things unsaid because time waits for no one. If you hold on to it, it will never be in the universe for the world to receive. We should never hold any human being hostage to our feelings or interpretation of their actions. If God can forgive the things we have done in the dark or the light, we have no excuse.
Until Next Time Lovies